And, not possible to create that which you do not understand. To get to the healthiest relationship with Self (loving, kind, considerate, compassionate, gentle, thoughtful, patient, tolerant, non-judgmental, etc.) you first need to address and deal with the unresolved emotional business from your past, in your own life. Then and only then will you be able to create the same with others. In the meantime, when it comes to creating healthy relationships with others here are a couple fundamental concepts, that if and when understood and then applied can increase your ability to create such: (1) the realization that every relationship has an “optimal” potential, (are you seeing the “truth” about the inherent potential and/or limitations of the relationship) and (2) the knowingness that all problems between people are due to misunderstanding, and since all misunderstanding stem from some sort of “mis-communication” (such as not enough information, too much information, inaccurate information, inappropriate information, and then factor in the intention behind the words spoken, honorable or not). Therefore, if mis-communication is the root cause of misunderstanding, the only possibility to turn things around is to engage in appropriate, accurate, healthy communication (for which most of us never received an adequate education on the “why” and the “how to”).